Happy Saturday =D!! Day 13 of my Search

Today is Day 13 of my Fast and I am learning so much along the way as you will see in this post.

Meditation for the 13th day:

For there are three that bear witness in heaven: the Father, the Word and the Holy Spirit; and these three are one. 1 John 5:7

I am enjoying a quite day at home... last night boyfriend and I had some quality time together, he had school early in the morning at 7 am and I was at work, but we managed to get some US time in and today he naps all day, poor baby he works in the night so he gets home around 7 am and will nap the whole day, just to head back to work tonight at 10 pm, and he will do the same tomorrow and Monday.

He has a hectic schedule and so much on his plate, and  I must tell you that I am ashamed of myself
Let me explain, I have been focusing on my spiritual life and because of that  I was able to realize that some of the actions and attitudes that I was exhibiting were not appropriate. Well as I just explained by Boyfriend goes to school in the AM and works at night, so that pretty much doesn't leave much free time for us to spend like we used to. So,  selfish me... I have been tormenting him and complaining about how HE DOES NOT HAVE TIME FOR ME!!.. Yes I said I was ashamed.

I realized that I wasn't being a supportive girlfriend, instead I was behaving like my old self... a selfish Brat, that was used to getting her way. So I did some soul searching and I read my second book, which is The fruits of the Flesh and the Fruits of the Spirit, and I realized that my Flesh was taking the best of me. So I  took my medicine and decided to be a big girl and I apologized for not being there for him, like he was and is for me specially  when I was in school and working even on the weekends he never complained. Pretty soon I will be in school again and will be working and will have limitation like he does, and I realized that It was not because he cared less for me, but because school needs to be completed and we have to wait for free time to have some fun.

I was so selfish and I used great terms and my knowledge in Psychology to make him think that I had a point, I even said I was not a Priority to him and how I felt abandoned =( yes i know.. so bad,  to which he Replied "You are a priority, Everything I do is for you". And he demonstrated it by making time for me. Yesterday he went to school from 7 am to 3 pm and needed to get to work from 10 pm to 6:30 am, in between there he takes a nap, but instead he went to my work to pick me up and spent some time with me. At around 8 pm, I saw his eyes bloodshot and tired and I felt so bad.. here I am making the person I Love suffer just to please my selfish desires. I saw him with my Spiritual eyes and with my heart and it hurt me to see him that way.  I realized that I was not being such a good person, and that instead of helping him be a better person, I was tormenting him. Abusing the Love he has for me and making him sacrifice himself to prove a point that didn't need to be proven.

I am supposed to be there for him, cheering him on and helping him be the best, just like he does for me, but instead I let the ideas of the world into my life and instead of appreciating the things he does, I focused on the things that he couldn't do. And Lost track of the things I am supposed to do for him.

Such a lesson learned, I was expecting to receive more than what I was giving... doesn't work that way in Life, School, Relationships and specially with God.

xoxox till tomorrow be Blessed Liz

Should "Fatties" Get a Room? (Even on TV?)

Should "Fatties" Get a Room? (Even on TV?)

As I arrived to work this morning.. I am greeted by my co worker who is telling me about this article written by Maura Kelly for marieclaire.com so I went over to read it.

You can take a look and read it just follow this link-- but maybe that's not such a good idea.. we will just be giving them more hits on their website =b.. ugh and I really don't want to do that.. but in case u r interested..  http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/dating-blog/overweight-couples-on-television

First let me tell you that I watch Mike and Molly and I have been doing so since the first Episode and I love it. I was excited to finally have a Show that has a Heart and shows feelings and can be relate able. The characters are great, and so down to earth and not fake and materialistic like other shows. I love Molly a School Teacher , played by the super adorable Melissa McCarthy (who played Sooky St James in Gilmore Girls and Dena in Samantha Who? ) and Mike one of Chicago's' Finest a Police officer who is played by Billy Gardell. I Love the characters and the Actors who portray them and to write something that undermines their work and their persons  is just so petty.

The show is about them finding each other and the struggles they endure some of them are in regards to their weight but mostly the show is about their blooming relationship and about the relationship they have with the people around them. I love the show because its a show that is Funny and has contents and its not a superficial show where every one is a size 1 and living in a penthouse or on the hills.

It's also more than a show about 2 people who are struggling with their over eating eating/weight. Its a show about Love and how two people who feel insecurities about themselves, finally take the leap of faith and put their fears to the side and take a chance on Love and on each other.  Something that we can all relate, because lets be honest we all have something that makes us insecure, that's what makes us human and I can empathise with others.

I am personally not offended by seeing two people who love each other kiss on TV or in public and I am not offended by seeing people who might not be what society thinks as perfect or beautiful show Public Displays of Affection. Love is Love and its a blessing to find it.

And I also understand that being overweight is not a good thing for health reasons. But no one has the right to criticize and make mean comments about other people and their appearance and say that they look disgusting.

However I am DISGUSTED by the Article written for marieclaire.com by Maura Kelly. I find that Article, the writer and specially marieclaire.com offensive for allowing this writer to write all that garbage.

I don't know about the rest of you, but to me by allowing this article to be posted on their website, it means that marieclaire.com supports this offensive view of overweight people.

To write about our opinions is one thing to blatantly state the following (straight quote from her article) is another.

"So anyway, yes, I think I'd be grossed out if I had to watch two characters with rolls and rolls of fat kissing each other ... because I'd be grossed out if I had to watch them doing anything. To be brutally honest, even in real life, I find it aesthetically displeasing to watch a very, very fat person simply walk across a room "—Should "Fatties" Get a Room? (Even on TV?) October 25, 2010 9:00 AM by Maura Kelly

You would think that this type of article would not have been written, specially in the wake of all the bulling that has been taking place and after a flood of all those Public Service announces calling for tolerance.

We need to remember that tolerance applies to every one who feels picked on for what ever reason be it that you are having issues with they way you look, your weight, sexual orientations, color or Race.
There was even one from President Obama calling for Tolerance and To Stop Bullying.. obviously this does not apply to certain people who think that because they look a certain way or have a certain job or position , they have the right to say offensive things and dictate what they think is beautiful, or acceptable in society.

If you are blessed to be in a position to get your voice across to the masses.. be responsible and let that VOICE be heard and used for goodness to uplift and help others , and not to criticize and beat someone down.

xoxox sea

****************************************************************************
PS... To learn more about the writer you can google her name or take a look at her bio below according to it she herself has has suffered from an eating disorder.. and maybe she is experiencing self loathing and is projecting her discomfort. I can only pray for her and hope that she learns from this and is able to learn to love herself and others.

***Her Bio from marieclaire.com
Maura Kelly

Maura Kelly is a freelance writer who is working on a novel. Some of the things she loves: indie rock, peanut butter, Fellini films, the Brooklyn Bridge, running (slowly) in Prospect Park (always wearing New Balance sneakers) and The Brothers Karamazov. And definitely her friends, too; her tight circle includes a fashion designer, a hard news journalist, a couple magazine editors, a bike messenger-turned-lawyer, a professor of philosophy and an aspiring screenwriter. On her dating resume, there's an unusual number of visual artists, a couple of jazz musicians, and one guy named Thor. Though she's in her thirties, she's never been in love before - and has started to wonder if she ever will be. She's decided she has to start making dating her job if it's ever going to happen. Hence, this blog. Her personal essays have appeared or are forthcoming in The New York Times, The New York Observer, The Washington Post, New York Press, Glamour, Salon, "Before and After: Stories from New York," and "Going Hungry: Writers on Desire, Denial and Overcoming Anorexia," to name a few.

Twitter.com/MauraKellyBlog

To GOD goes all the Glory !!

Yesterday I logged into my Schools web site and I found pictures of my Commencement Exercise. So I went through the whole Library to see the expressions on every graduates face, and I loved seeing their faces. I saw Tears, Happy Smiles, Eyes deep in search for their love ones among the multitude of faces. And a whole lot of Cell Phones..=D

And it brought back memories, on that day as I was walking towards the stage I felt this unexplainable feeling. My eyes started to tear up (after I had told myself "Don't cry" ).
But it was unexplainable..I felt a rush of emotions all in seconds.. two steps away from the stage as my name was being chopped when being called out.. all I said was Thank You GOD!!
I was overwhelmed by what I was about to experience, see I had a hard time getting my degree, I had family obligations to my parents that I needed to focus on , that took me away from school for a couple of semesters, but I have no regrets, I grew up and I became responsible. I had to get a full time Job and help support my parents, and on paper it shows that I was no longer a dependent student and now I was considered independent so they kinda want you to pay your tuition. So it was almost impossible to be able to work full time and afford to attend school. But I am so grateful to God that he opened the door and made it possible. I could not have done it with out the support of certain angels. First and Foremost THANK YOU!! GOD for giving me the strenght to accomplish this. Second Thank you to all my UCKG/IURD Pastors for their Prayers and their Guidance and for teaching me that "with out Sacrifice", nothing can be accomplished. At work my friends had to cover me on the days I was not in, And my special partner in crime who would go with me to look for supplies,and books that I needed . He would look on E-Bay and half.com for texts at a reduced price than what the book store was selling them. and I had to work on weekends to make up my work hours and of course a big Thank You to my HR. and former Manager and new manager for working with me and allowing me to work the weekends so that I could afford to go to school two days out of the week. And many co-workers and friends who believed in my potential and who supported me emotionally, always telling me how proud they were.

That meant the world and kept me going. Specially on my many sleepless nights , see I had 2 days for school and had to get assignments done in the evening because I had work the following day. Many days I was running on 3 hours of sleep. All that rushed into my mind as I was walking up to the stage. And at that moment I was pleased with myself. I began my college career trying to please my mother. But I finished it pleasing myself and learning that there is no such thing as impossible, when we put our minds to it.


But the best part was sharing this with my nephew and Inspiring him. Seeing the Sparkle in his little brown eyes and listening to him tell me how he is going to go to College and he is going to have a Blue car and take me shopping. That was as Master Card says -- Priceless!!

• Abnormal Psychology Text book on ebay: $60

• "A" on a term paper that took the whole night : $10

( Monster Energy Drink and Green Tea)

• The Look on my nephews face as he wore my Cap and imagined himself a College Graduate:

" PRICELESS!! "

I also have a 4 year old Niece and I hope that when she gets older, I am also able to Inspire her.